Wrap: Chiang Mai, Maehongson, 3,000+ Curves

...................................AH!

To wake the day and find you are standing atop an elephant, in the Pai River, in Northern Thailand. Really adds pep to that morning commute.

It's funny, I can't wait to blog, and then sit here (after much faux techie dallying, always -- suffice to say, I cannot post video; and don't kick the chair or the computer crashes) and wonder how I can possibly 'splain the tip of the iceberg.

To mix metaphors.

Let's take a new tack today: What have we learned?

* That elephants may henceforth be referred to as "banana-eating machines." And enjoy dunking you every bit as much as, say, Toby.

* That the Thai are infintely friendly and polite; to a fault, even. So much so that our guide waited three days to tell us that shortly after we left, his daughter called to say his wife had been hospitalized... and he interrupted the conversation to humor a local woman who was explaining that, because their coffee maker was out, they'd like to offer us a glass of juice on the house; and by the way there's a guest house for rent on the top of the hill, next time we're in the area; you see she used to be a teacher, but retired, and...

[-Ok, well, back in the car. -But, um, about your wife?]

Note to Dad & Vic, who turned us on to Suwit, who's been wonderful: it sounds like she'll be pretty ok, at least considering after an earlier stroke (this one was apparently prevented with quick action and blood-thinners) she was semi-wheelchair bound.


It's also true they will not give you bad news: such as, This road I've selected is superduper(!) curvy (the Maehongson chamber of commerce opens early to provide visitors with a certificate notarizing the 1,864 curves you've endured on the road from Chiang Mai, though you must remove your shoes to enter); there's no food from 7 a.m. to 3 p.m.; everyone here drives crazy; and we'll never (and didn't) make it before dark.



* A lot of places in Northern Thailand, it's awfully hard to take a bad picture. (Others, if you take more than, oh, say, 1,000, your girlfriend gets a little sick of it.) This photo shows that, although it's a shortcut to burn your rice field for fertilizer, the result not only smells pretty cool, it makes for some awesome valley settings.



Conversely, it's hard to take a good one in a cave; even a really great cave. But we already know this. It's just that sometimes you need something to do, in a cave.



* Rich likes food pictures.



(Why yes, that is my awesome girlfriend, about to devour one delicious! red herring that arrived head, tail, and skin.)

* Um. At a certain roadside stand in the mountains yesterday... I might have eaten a cat.

Might.

Have eaten.

A cat.

(That's what I get for passing up the bag of grasshoppers in Chiang Mai.)

* Ashley is very, very patient. Sensitive soul, yes, but she travels well and can put up with a lot! Plus, very practical. She tells me this is from the seven years in New Yawk: "We get things done." And of course, still lovely. (And a big fan of elephants -- even more than tigers!)

* There's a great place for grilled duck in Bangkok. (Thanks to Suwit for that tip.) Ah, but the king -- longest-running king anywhere in the world, over 60 years -- is not healthy enough to deliver his birthday speech... again... this year.

Also learned: the Thais love the king literally as a God here on Earth. The crown prince, though: kind of a shmuck.

* Thailand may seem like a smallish country, but it's got a ton to offer. We've canvassed just a tiny corner (Google maps the Chiang Mai and Maehongson provinces) and I've told you just a small fraction, but imagine the change when we hit Bangkok, for instance, or the ocean abutted by limestone cliffs.

* For once, I'm finally about out of words.